Delete her number.
Stop ringing her. Stop messaging her. Stop making excuses to see her, to drop by her place.

Erase her name from memory. Remove yourself from her life, more completely than you would like but as completely as she deserves. Move on, so that you can allow her to also move on. When you close your eyes, you don’t get to see her face. Not anymore. You don’t get to think about her lips, the warm glow of her skin when she rests next to you, or how she squeezes your hand in her sleep. You are not allowed to remember the smell of her perfume, that she only drinks mint tea (with two dollops of honey), or that she loves you.

She loves you.

She has been in love with you for too long.

So, forget how she says your name. Forget how she calls your name. Forget how she screams your name. Forget that time you got sick and she stayed up with you all night, letting you lay your head in her lap and holding a cold compress to your forehead. Forget how her hair feels in your fingers. Forget how she looks in your sweatshirts.

Forget her.

Know only that she existed at one point in your life, but relinquish all hope that she could exist at another point — sometime in the future that you are unwilling to specify because you don’t know what you want. Yet. It is not fair for you to swoop in and out of her life as you choose. It is not fair for you to say that you are satisfied with “things as they are” and you will have time to “figure it out” later. Let her stop investing emotionally in you. Let her pour that love and care into the people who deserve her.

Don’t tell her that you think about her all the time. Don’t tell her that it bothers you to hear about her with other people, but that you’re willing to understand as long as she likes you more than them. Don’t tell her that this isn’t the right moment but that there will be a right moment. There is not going to be a right moment. She shouldn’t have to wait for the right moment.

Don’t tell her that you can’t handle ultimatums, that you don’t like the idea of finally adding finality to your relationship — whatever still remains of it.

What you are telling her is that you want to keep her on as an option, that you are taking her for granted, that you want to know she will be there, that you can depend on her at the end of the day. When you find that no one else has stuck around or that those who have are less interesting, less thoughtful, or less doggedly loyal to you.

Doggedly loyal to you.

That is what she has been to you, for you almost as long as you have known her: a constant emotional crutch, the guarantee of stability, a safety net while you reachvout to grasp objects that sparkle and shine far greater than she does. All that glitters is not gold, haven’t you heard?

She is fire. You are ice, and you are afraid that her slow burn will smolder your cool, hard demeanor. That’s what has driven your decisions, your actions all along: fear. You are a coward. You are a hypocrite. You are terrified to let her go, but you are afraid she is too good for you, that she could drive you wild, that you would choke on her flames. That she is too much for you to handle right now.

Right now.

But if you choose not to love her now, you can’t choose to love her later.

(via laurenhooper)


having 3 friends is a lot of work

(via sheisliving)


Woke up to a letter
The Letter (detail) (1910) , Julian Weir / Don’t Look Down, Kanye West ft. Mos Def, Big Sean & Lupe Fiasco

I’m going apple/pumpkin picking/hayriding tomorrow and I have the most stereotypical white grl outfit picked out I’m excited


i’m having a lot of thoughts right now that i need to type out and hold on to  but fair warning it might be a little offputting to some people (ie another way of saying, “i’m prepared to lose followers for this” lol)

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i’m good with people sharing articles about eating disorders on facebook….it’s great! spread information! educate the public!

…but when your article has pictures of v underweight, unwell individuals in it……(because they always do….because that’s what everyone with an ed looks like remember??)…..those tend to show up as the thumbnail…………and that thumbnail is visible to anyone…..and honestly??? if you’re sharing those articles….your friend list probably consists of mostly people in various stages of recovery…………that is your audience……….

and your audience doesn’t wanna see that shit ok



you can just tell that Nicki Minaj is the kind of person that when you’re telling a story and everyone else in the group is talking over you, she’s making direct eye contact with you and paying extra attention so that you don’t get discouraged and stop mid-story

(via decembershits)


here have some puppies xoxoxo

OH DUH of course it was my lovely kaitlyn ily
ohanniepo asked:
idk i'm just wishin u had said "i'm weird and off" instead of "i'm *feeling* weird and off" because then i could have said "hi weird and off, i'm dad."


Want to Un-Learn Your Socialized Niceness and Reinforce your Assertiveness?


Practice By Using the Following Phrases When the Opportunity Arrises:

"I’m not interested."

"(Please) Leave me alone."

"I’d rather you not."

"That doesn’t interest me at all."

"You need to stop."


"That’s not what I said."

"I don’t owe you/anyone an…

(Source: feminishblog)